A journey through crisis, conflict, and closure, and the leadership principles that carried me through.
When my mom fell on April 1st, everything changed. In the days that followed, I wasn’t just her daughter, I was also the communicator, the decision-maker, and the steady hand in the storm.
What I didn’t realize at the time was that the following six weeks would test every leadership skill I’d built over decades in the hospitality industry… and then some.
This article is the closing chapter of my When Leadership Gets Personal series—a reflection on the three stages of this journey, the lessons that emerged, and a resource you can keep for your own moments of high-stakes leadership.
The Journey in Three Stages
Stage 1 – Crisis in the Hospital
Six siblings, an unpredictable medical situation, and my mom, confused from her dementia, needing 24/7 care and constant re-explanations of what had happened. My goal was simple yet challenging: to ensure every sibling felt heard while still moving decisions forward.
Lesson Highlight: Clear, consistent communication is your most valuable leadership tool when facts are changing by the hour. 📖 [Read Part 1 here]
Stage 2 – Family Conflict & Communication Breakdowns
Not everyone could contribute equally. Not everyone agreed on the pace or the process. And one heated argument reminded me that even years of leadership training can’t always override raw human emotion in the moment.
Lesson Highlight: Playing to strengths and agreeing on ground rules up front can prevent small tensions from becoming lasting damage. 📖 [Read Part 2 here]
Stage 3 – The Aftermath & Letting Go
I thought there might be a pause after my mom’s passing on April 9th. There wasn’t. Before the May 9th funeral, we were already knee-deep in trust administration, sorting belongings, and dealing with a $30,000 mold problem that pushed us to sell the house “as is.” Three of us led most of that process, while my three sisters took on the funeral and celebration of life planning, a true division of responsibilities.
Lesson Highlight: Leadership isn’t always in the boardroom; sometimes it’s in a kitchen surrounded by moving boxes and paperwork. 📖 [Read Part 3 here]
7 Leadership Lessons for Life and Work
- Uneven Participation is Normal – Don’t waste energy wishing for equal contribution.
- Clear Rules Save Relationships – Decide how decisions will be made before you need to make them.
- Play to Strengths – Assign roles based on ability, not fairness.
- Transparency Reduces Conflict – Share information early, even if incomplete.
- Don’t Avoid the Hard Conversations – Silence rarely makes tension disappear.
- Act Decisively, Adjust if Needed – Progress beats perfection in high-stress moments.
- Take Care of Yourself, Too – You can’t lead well if you’re completely depleted.
Your Free Resource
I’ve taken these lessons and distilled them into a one-page field guide you can keep for reference—whether you’re leading through a workplace crisis or a personal one.
Download here: GET THE GUIDE
It includes the seven lessons above and a quick “self-check” for crisis situations.
Final Reflection
This series began as a way to process my mom’s final days, but it became something more—a reminder that leadership is not confined to titles, workplaces, or quarterly goals. It shows up in kitchens, hospitals, and living rooms. It shows up when emotions are high and the stakes are deeply personal.
If you’ve read all three parts, thank you for walking this path with me. If you’ve lived something similar, I’d love to hear your story.
💬 Share your reflections in the comments or contact me privately. Download the guide, it’s my gift to help you lead when it matters most.
